Wednesday, December 17, 2014

Merry Drinkmas

A little poem for the holidays.

Twas guys night before Christmas and all through the bar
All the creatures were drinking, forgetting where they parked their car.

The drinks were placed on the counter, made with a steady hand
While a couple guys contemplated doing a keg stand.

The children and pets were snug in their beds
While their dads and caretakers drank their self meds.

And then, while they were tinkling, there came from the roof,
A shout of a drunk guy calling the whole group aloof.

We couldn't believe the gall of this prick,
but lo and behold, the asshole was Saint Nick!

Turns out he drinks a lot when not in his sleigh,
figuring that his reindeer will just find the way.

So Saint Nick bellied up to the bar with us for a shot,
all men trying to prove that pussies they were not.

As we all ended the night, calling for a cab,
the big man yelled "thanks" for picking up the tab.

He stumbled to his sleigh at the end of this long night,
shouting "Merry Drinkmas to all, Jesus, Rudolph's nose if f***ing bright!"

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